User blog comment:Ubertheif/Fictional Chaos/@comment-26892768-20170701194620/@comment-26892768-20170701200128

Yeah, it's nice to hear praise, but it ultimately doesn't help you become a better writer. Anyway, since I've finished...

More dialogue (always a good thing), but now you're talking about characters you never introduced us to, and while you have more detail (to the point where chapter 2 is nearly twice as long), there are still moments where you avoid describing things in detail.

But, it is an improvement.